


an expanse of emotions

by forgottenwords



Category: 19天 - Old先 | 19 Days - Old Xian
Genre: Angst, Ch. 175, Ch. 341, Ch. 342, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family, Fluff, Friendship, Humor, Hurt No Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-19
Updated: 2021-01-12
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:00:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 1,401
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27626443
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/forgottenwords/pseuds/forgottenwords
Summary: A collection of 100 word oneshots of the 19 days boys.Ch. 10:ZhanYi: Hesitant: Just because he was quiet, didn’t mean that he didn’t have things to say.
Relationships: He Cheng/Brother Qiu (19 Days), He Tian & Mo Guanshan (19 Days), He Tian/Mo Guanshan (19 Days)
Comments: 5
Kudos: 106





	1. Forced to Enjoy It

**Author's Note:**

> Chapter 1:TianShan: _Forced to Enjoy It_ : He wanted a human reaction, and it was heartbreaking.

He thinks back, thinks back on the early moments that they had together.  
The awkward, short interactions that led to so much more. A fight, a kiss, more fighting. It loops back around in his head on repeat.  
A moment so uncontrolled, so violating that he didn’t know how to respond. 

A disgusting action of provoking him, the action itself was violating, but it was meant to make him act in return.  
He Tian wanted him to act. He knows now, that the other boy didn’t want to harm him.

He just wanted a human reaction, and it was heartbreaking.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I figured this would be a more manageable project, instead of a long multichap fic. 
> 
> you can find me[ @ultraforgottenwords](http://ultraforgottenwords.tumblr.com)


	2. Odd

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jian Yi, Zhan, Tian & Mo: _Odd_ :They were all odd, in their own way.

He knew the moment their classmate started talking about “all natural” and “rejuvenating” that they were going to be held up. Jian Yi was a sucker about skincare stuff, a fact that a few of the girls in their class took advantage of. 

Guan Shan was beside him, also puzzled at the scene playing out before them. Tian arrived moments later, surprising them as he leaned on their shoulders. 

“He’s an odd one eh? The girls love it.”

“Why, you jealous?” Mo grumbled back.

Zhan shook his head, a small smile forming. They were all odd, in their own way.


	3. Lab Rat (i)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> post 341: He Tian & Mo: _Lab Rat_ : If anything, it was the others favourite pastime.

“Put me down asshole!”

“Now, now Little Mo, why don’t you try asking nicely?”

His grip on the doorway faltered, he knew that He Tian just wanted to watch him squirm. If anything, it was the others' favourite pastime. But the way his legs were wrapped around Tian, how his hands were gripping his thighs, it was _more_ than just watching him squirm. It was suggestive, it was a familiar taunt. It made his resolution flutter. His stomach flipped, cheeks unwantedly heating up at the shameless grin Tian was giving him. 

He wanted to see him squirm just as much.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TBC
> 
> also! if you guys wanna give me some prompts that would be cool! I have a list i'm going off, but i'd be super open to other prompts :) 
> 
> I hope everyone is enjoying so far!


	4. Games (ii)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> post 341 (ii) He Tian & Mo: _Games_ : To show him that he couldn't play him the way he wanted.

I’d be easy, so easy. 

He could simply relish his grip from the doorframe and wrap his arms around He Tian’s neck. To show him that he couldn't play him the way he wanted. 

Legs tight around Tian’s midsection, the other holding up his whole weight; he didn’t need to be saved, he needed to be in control. 

It'd be easy to place his lips on Tian’s neck, to gently press down and sigh a heavy, warm, tantalizing breath against his skin.

Then, he’d clear his throat, exhale loudly against his ear and say: “You’ll always be a chicken dick.”


	5. Dance (iii)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> post ch. 342- Dance: He was tired of it. How He Tian continually aggravated him to the point of violence. It was too much.

But he was tired of it. How He Tian continually aggravated him to the point of violence. They had a strange way of interacting with one another, sure, not the typical way “friends” would interact. Jian Yi and Zhan had that sort of relationship, and sometimes it made him jealous. He’d never admit it, but as he sat in the tub, water up to his armpits, he couldn’t help but wish that things were different. 

The unwanted touch at his back, a series of flashbacks brought up in his dream today...it all made him sick to his stomach. The thought of his father in jail framed for a murder he would never commit, it was too much. _All_ of it was too much. 

“Fuck. _Fuck_.”

His heart was pounding, and he had the distinct inkling that he was going to puke. His tunnel vision led him to the closest available opening, the sink which was a few feet away from the tub. 

It crossed his mind as he heaved into the sink, but He Tian must have let go of him at some point. And was now watching him dry heave into the sink, clothes dripping onto the floor. His head was spinning, acid burning on his tongue and eyes burning at the feeling and humiliation of puking in front of He Tian. 

“Hey, Mo, it’s okay. You’re alright…”

The words were a shallow comfort, even though he knew that He Tian meant them. He sounded strange, worried almost. It was a kaleidoscope, scenes that changed every time you rotated the situation. 

A hand laid on his back was all it took. 

“ _Don’t touch me_!”

It was loud, it was demanding. It felt like She Li was creeping up his back, asking for his pound of flesh. Dammit. God dammit. 

That was all it took for the room to stop. He could feel his heart slow down, palms still clammy against the porcelain sink. 

It was enough though, for He Tian to back off. He didn’t want to be comforted, it was too much. Fuck, it was too much. 

“Guan Shan…”

He tilted his head and gave a short laugh, feeling more humiliated by the second. 

“What? Is there anything else you want to do to make me feel like an idiot? Dumping me in the tub wasn’t enough?”

“I-I’m sorry, I didn’t mean for you to feel like this.”

His head was spinning, “How was I supposed to feel? Fucking bastard, I can’t...I don’t know what to _do_.”

“Little Mo…”

“Don’t call me that! I can’t take it, not now…”

He was in too deep, he needed to leave. What else was there to do?

“Is this about your nightmare today?”

“Oh go _fuck_ yourself _Tian_. You have no idea what I go through.”

It wasn’t easy to push away from the sink, but he did it. He was soaking wet, rage in his eyes and he turned around to face the other boy.

“Get me a cab.”


	6. Apology (i)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qiu & Cheng: Apology: It was an ordinary evening as ever. As ordinary as it was supervising four teenagers, one that may or may not be considered his boss.

It was an ordinary evening as ever. As ordinary as it was supervising four teenagers, one that may or may not be considered his boss.

“How long have I worked for you?”

“Qiu?”

“How long?”

He Cheng tilted his head, regarding him with a confused look. 

“Has it really been ten years?”

“And I’ve been reduced to being your little brother's, friends, lap dog?”

Cheng choked over his drink as he went to take a mouthful, eyes wide as he gave him a surprised gaze. 

He crossed his arms, feigning a pained look. “Ten years, and I’m a glorified babysitter.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Sorry I've been away, finals have been kicking my ass. I'll hopefully be more active over christmas break.


	7. Bond (ii)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Qiu & Cheng: Ch 7: _Bond_ : Cheng had the audacity to sound offended. “Qiu.” He raised an eyebrow, slowly turning his head to peer at the other man.
> 
> “You do more than you give yourself credit for. And you are definitely not a glorified babysitter.”

Cheng had the audacity to sound offended. “Qiu.”

He raised an eyebrow, slowly turning his head to peer at the other man.

“You do more than you give yourself credit for. And you are definitely _not_ a glorified babysitter.”

The restaurant was hustling with activity in the background, the four boys they were watching from the bar chatting excitedly over their food. 

“Still kind of feels like it.”

His beer was probably getting warm, the liquid casting amber shadows on the glossy table underneath.

Cheng’s next words were brutally honest. 

“I don’t know what I’d do if you ever quit.”


	8. Drunk (iii)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ch.8 Qiu&Cheng: Drunk(iii): He idly picked up his beer and took a swig.
> 
> “Because the last time you said something like that you were completely wasted.”
> 
> It was a fond memory, and it brought a sly grin to his face.

“Are you drunk?”

“What!? No?”

He idly picked up his beer and took a swig.

“Because the last time you said something like that you were completely wasted.”

It was a fond memory, and it brought a sly grin to his face. Cheng likely had no recollection of what he’d said that night. 

The other man visibly jolted in his chair, leg bouncing at his side as Qiu turned to face him. Cheng opened his mouth to speak, but another voice interrupted. 

“Oi, lovebirds! Can we go now?”

Qiu vowed to make Jian Yi run two extra miles tomorrow morning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope everybody had a good holidays! :)


	9. Don't Touch Them

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 9: Qiu & the boys: _Don't Touch Them_ : The amount of guns in the room was alarming. 
> 
> Zhan elbowed Jian Yi, “Take the hint dummy.”
> 
> “But how’d he know where we’d be?” He pouted.

“Put it down.”

“Qiu!”

“Shut up! Didn’t I tell you to be quiet?”

The amount of guns in the room was alarming. 

Zhan elbowed Jian Yi, “Take the hint dummy.”

“But how’d he know where we’d be?” He pouted. 

Mo smacked the back of his head, ignoring the protest of ‘hey!'

“You have your phone don’t you? I thought Qiu had a GPS tracker?”

“Oh. Does he?”

Their captor stood with his mouth open, bewildered at their blatant disregard of imminent danger. 

Tian grinned, “My brothers probably got fifty other men outside, sure you don’t want to let us go?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> consistent chapter summaries who??? 
> 
> also have a good new year everybody :)


	10. Hesitant

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 10: ZhanYi: _Hesitant_ : Just because he was quiet, didn’t mean that he didn’t have things to say.

He was quiet. He knew he was, there was no need to fill awkward silences with words that held no meaning. 

But that didn’t mean he didn’t want to speak.

He’d take one look at Jian Yi, the other boy smiling, carefree, and the words would dry up in his mouth. 

Just because he was quiet, didn’t mean that he didn’t have things to say. 

There were many things he wished to tell Jian Yi.

How much he truly meant to him, that he sometimes woke up in the middle of the night scared that he might be kidnapped again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1/10 of the way thereee


End file.
